Being a mother is hard and the mom-shaming is very real in this generation of motherhood. That type of judgment has always existed, but it’s about time we all step up and say that we have had enough. The worst mom shamers of them all are other mothers themselves which is so disheartening. To combat mom-shaming and overall judgment, we need to all stop worrying about what other moms are doing with themselves and their families.
We’re all doing the best we can out here and don’t know what anyone else is going through. We’re all dealing with personal life events, work stresses, family life, etc., and this life is way too short to take the time and worry about another mom living her life. Being involved and only worrying yourself is mentally freeing. Here are 10 things we should not worry about another mom doing.
10 What They Feed Their Kids
This feeding debate in motherhood starts at birth as exhausted new moms argue over whether breastfeeding is best or if formula is acceptable. It’s exhausting. In reality, it doesn’t really matter what you fed your baby once they hit school age.
Moms all have different outlooks on nutrition, but we shouldn’t worry about what other moms feed their kids. Just understand other moms are making different choices or can only afford cheap fast food. Bento boxes full of healthy food and lunches full of store-bought snacks all mean that the child is being fed. Chicken nuggets and fresh baked chicken breast fill a child all the same.
9 Their Hobbies Outside Of Motherhood
Unless it’s hunting humans for sport or any other highly illegal activity, what a mother does during her precious free time is her own business. Don’t worry about a mom who may have unconventional hobbies like pole dancing or hunting or even just drinking too much when they can. We’re women and humans as well as mothers who are allowed to have lives outside our kids.
8 What They Wear
Motherhood and being an adult are hard enough without our peers dissecting their outfits. That mom wearing stained yoga pants and a messy bun isn’t comfortable and likely exhausted. That mom over there has a full face of makeup, skinny jeans, and sleek hair did all that because she wanted to. And that other mom in a crop top and shorts may be embracing her body for the first time. The moms aren’t in school and don’t need to follow a dress code.
7 How They Dress Their Kids
Kids are kids. Unless it’s a special occasion, young kids may look a little unkempt or may even leave their home in clothes adults can’t get away with. How a mom dresses her kids isn’t a good indicator of her parenting skills. Times are hard and clothes are expensive. Thrift stores exist for a reason.
Let’s not forget that some kids and teens are very expressive and create their own mod podge of outfits. A mismatched out-of-season ensemble may look silly, but it may have been a battle mom didn’t want to fight.
6 How Often They Clean Their House Or Don’t Clean It
How often and how thoroughly we clean our homes will vary in every household. We all have different opinions over what is dirty and what is just a lived-in mess. Short of roaches and filth, a mom’s home that is piled with laundry and littered with toys doesn’t need to be looked down upon.
Depression, anxiety, and life circumstances can also play a role in how clean a home is. We don’t know what others are going through and what they have going on that may be making small tasks extremely difficult.
5 If They’re Crafty Or Helpful At School
Moms who love to do nice crafts can fall into the connotation of the “perfect Pinterest” mom who sets out to make others look bad. There is also the possibility that this mom loves to do crafts and enjoys going all out for things like costumes. The mom who is always at the school volunteering or going on field trips is helping because they want to, and they can, not to make others feel bad.
4 How Much Screentime They Allow
If you’re worried by how much screen time a mom allows, please don’t, it really isn’t your place. Sure, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that children between the ages of two and five have less than an hour of screen time a day and that kids five and older should have two hours of screen time or less. But sometimes screen time is the only thing between a mom and meeting a deadline or finishing dinner or recovering from not feeling well.
3 Their Body & Work Out Habits
Just no. Body-shaming is gross and women are subjected to societal body pressures starting in elementary school Pregnancies and age change bodies and so does what we’re dealing with in our lives. Weight can always be lost, and a body can get stronger, but what really needs to change is the mindset of looking Hollywood perfect when none of us have trainers, home gyms, nannies, chefs, housekeepers, or business managers to help us find the time and motivation to work out.
On the other hand, some moms are in fantastic shape. Not worrying about another mom’s body is just great advice overall.
2 How They Make Money
This is another bad question and another sensitive topic. It’s very personal and how much a person makes takes on different meanings. Worrying about a mom’s finances and where it’s coming from comes off as very tacky. There shouldn’t be any shame in earning money at any job in any position. Every job, especially those in service, keeps our society going. If a mom is bringing money home and raising kids,
1 Their Personal Relationships
Sure, it’s very intriguing when your kid’s classmate’s mom has a new boyfriend every month, but that isn’t any of your business. Is Tommy being cared for and getting to school every day? He is? Well, then, that’s all we need to worry about.
Source: Romper, We Got To Talk, American Academy of Pediatrics
Don’t Worry Moms, I Have No Idea What I Am Doing Either
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